ORLANDO, FL — Ex-President Donald Trump, about to speak at the annual CPAC conference of conservative movers and shakers, was quick to address recent reports that the stage-dias area at its venue here in Orlando is suspiciously shaped like a well-known Germanic rune appropriated decades ago by the Nazis as a symbol of military and racial superiority.
The Odal rune, from an ancient Germanic alphabet, was used as the symbol of the Nazi’s SS racial purity office as well as its SS Mountain Division military unit. Subsequently, it has been use by white supremacist groups in the U.S., South Africa and elsewhere. The shape and orientation shown in Inset A. of the photo is what observers supposed the CPAC stage to be referencing.
Trump himself countered that the symbol was not, in fact, the Odal rune at all. Instead, Trump claimed to have designed it himself, using his “tablet.” Holding up an old Etch-a-Sketch toy, Trump showed the gathered press what he’d created on his “computer.” It, in fact, looked like the rune, but as if it had been rotated 90 degrees (see Inset B.). Trump, however, insisted it was what he called a “Jeebus fish,” or what scholars refer to as an “ichthys,” an ancient pictograph (see Inset C.) symbolizing Jesus, erstwhile fisherman, rabblerouser and self-styled Son of God.
Trump went on to assert that he wanted to “fill the Hyatt with love, broads and holy stuff. And fish. Plenty of tasty fish” with his original visual theme, apparently referring to the CPAC venue, unidentified women and Jesus. The final design, while bearing a resemblance to Trump’s childish scribble, could — if one had been drinking especially early that Sunday — be loosely interpreted as a “Jeebus fish” (see Inset D.).
National Socialist Movement spokesman Buford “Whitey” Himmler seemed to at first distance his organization and its allies when shown a picture of Trump’s Etch-a-Sketch noodlings. “What is this? Some retard drew an Odal on his toy. So?”
When it was revealed to Mr. Himmler that the artwork was, in fact, the work of the former President, Himmler added “oh, well. That’s a different story, isn’t it? I think it shows a real feel for composition. There’s a certain linear integrity to the whole thing. Almost Bauhausian in intent. Well, if one can get past any references to that Jew-schtupping degenerate, Gropius, and his Weimar Bolshevist pals.”
Trump, for his part, seems content to bask in the glow of his newfound graphic design skills. Pointing again to the Etch-a-Sketch, the ex-president indicated that “Rudy is going to show me how to load Photoshop onto this thing. I have a photo of Sleepy Joe that needs some serious retouching!”